facing reality

2012-02-11T08:06:00.000-08:00

REALLY REALLY DAMN TIRED FROM YESTERDAY!

What the heck happened to mind over body?

I also don't know!

My calves feel damn tight...

Why is the passion suddenly fading away?

It's too soon to dissapear.

I still wanna see myself playing for the next 5 years.

Well at least until i migrate!

There's still so much that I wanna do

and yet there's way too many restrictions.

Restrictions that are forbidding me

to accomplish my utmost goal.

This feeling I have...

2012-02-09T10:02:00.000-08:00

OKAY I TAKE IT BACK!

EXAMS IS GOOD!

I WANNA DO WELL IN LIFE

AND EARN LOTS AND LOTS OF MONEY

SO THAT I CAN TRAVEL AROUND THE WORLD!

OKAY GO AND STUDY NOW

ACOTANZA NEVINE MAE DIALA!!!

Just push on for awhile more guys:D

after exams you're free to do what you want any time:)

IWANTTOLIVEASTRESSFREELIFE

2012-02-09T09:53:00.000-08:00

WHO'S ACTUALLY AWAKE AT THIS HOUR

STUDYING FOR THEIR EXAMS???

AND WHO SAID THAT POLY IS SLACK?!

I can't believe that I'm still awake just to do my notes!

During exam period I tend to eat more!

Then you get fatter

And I have to stay-up late=

Higher electricity bill for the month

It is not good for my health

That's a good enough reason not to have exams right?!?!

CTs already can kill

What more EXAMS?!?!

IJUSTWANNAPLAYULTIMATETHEWHOLEDAY!!!

ANDACTUALLYNOTSTUDYFOREXAMS!!!

ICANTWAITFOREXAMSTOBEOVER!!!

ICANTWAITTOGOONACRUISE!!!

ICANTWAITTOGOBACKHOME

AND

SPENDLOTSOFTIMEWITHMYGRANDMOTHER!!!

IJUSTWANTTOLIVEASTRESSFREELIFE!!!

WITHOUTHAVINGTOWORRYABOUTASSIGNEMENTS

ANDALSOPROJECTS!!!

WITHOUTHAVINGTOWAKEUPEVERYMORNING

SOFREAKINGEARLY!!!

WITHOUTTHINKINGIFISHOULDATTENTORPONLECTURES!!!

This is what defines you~

2012-02-06T23:14:00.000-08:00

There are so many things running in my mind now.

Some I wanna forget

Yet some I wanna live with for the rest of my life.

These thoughts and memories have made me into what I am today...

In just 2 weeks time, its the end of my Year 1 in Poly.

That was fast and a lot have changed

I would have never thought that Poly life was the right choice for me.

But God has a plan for each and everyone of us right?

Though I may say that I think I made the right decision

I will never know what kind of life JC will bring.

Maybe it will be better? Or let's just say worse?

But all I know is that there's a good reason why I'm in Poly.

But till now, I don't have a clue on that reason.

But everything happens in his time right?

Poly have taught me lots of lessons in life.

For instant, always rely in yourself.

Never put so much trust in a person!

Because one day you might find yourself at the edge of the

the rope not knowing what's the next thing to do.

But at the same time what reasons do people have to trust in you?

Everyone breaks the trust that people gives them.

Well we are human after all right?

But sometimes the extent in which trust is broken

defines how much trust can be given to that person.

I myself am guilty of this...

But that's life isin't it?

People come and go.

For those who have stayed, Thank You!

For those who left, well I'm sorry.

Lord, please tell me that I made the right decision.

I'm given this opportunity and I'll use it.

I don't want to live in a world of many regrets

Regrets that will haunt me down later on in life.

There's a reason for everything and I will believe in that!

A new beginning~

2012-01-10T08:16:00.000-08:00

It's 2012!!!

I've been so busy that I didn't even write a post for 2011

Well 2011 ended well:D

It was a year where lots of changes was done

And a year where I found a new source of happiness.

The start of 2012 has been rough

with all the projects and deadlines to meet...

But I can do this!

it's gonna be a good break after the next tiring 6 weeks!

Can't wait to go back and be with my Grandma:D

Okay off to bed:D

Helpless~

2011-12-13T08:20:00.000-08:00

"I don't like feeling this way...

It's as if my mind doesn't belong to me anymore..."

CTs^^

2011-12-12T09:02:00.000-08:00

Its been a crazy day today!!!

Lots of studying:D:D:D

Did Business Statistics

then EBA:D

Hope Bstats is easy so I can quickly

go after the paper and go gym-ing with Trina

and then bathe then go Macs and study

till 8 then go home then watch a bit then sleep!!!

That's my plan tmr!

I must finish with the last 2 chapters of EBA!

Really thankful for my modules this sem

a lot of people out there are dying with CTs!

okay off to bed still have to wake up early

tmr to study in school with Trina before my paper!

Nights everyone!:D

Hope you guys had an awesome day!

Back to normal~

2011-12-11T08:03:00.001-08:00

I don't know whether to be happy or sad today!:(

This year will end well

Due to the fact that I had so much fun

for the past two weeks!

And that's all thanks to you <3

No matter how far you are I'm sure nothing will change!

So it was Aubrey's first birthday!

And it's nice to see how big she is now:D

She's already walking and talking!

Love how I was so distracted by the kids

How they just takes away

whatever problems I have!

Sometimes I'm really jealous of them

How carefree their lives are

and how happy they would be with simple things

But as we all grow up we tend to forget all these.

Didn't touch my book at all today:(

I guess for the very fact that I only have 2 papers

I'm am kinda slacking...

Bstats one Tuesday and it's open book

then EBA on Thursday!

People say I'm a closet mugger:/

Haha which part of me gives everyone that impression?

How I wish I really am a closet mugger...

Okay off to bed!

Tmr will be a long day spent with my

Bstats notes and EBA textbook!

Kung tayo’y matanda na
Sana’y di tayo magbago
At kailan ma’y, nasaan ma’y
Ito ang pangarap ko

Makuha mo pa kayang
Ako’y hagkan at yakapin ooh
Hanggang pagtanda natin
Nagtatanong lang sa `yo
Ako pa kaya’y ibigin mo
Kung maputi na ang buhok ko

Pagdating ng araw
Ang `yong buhok
Ay puputi na rin (puputi na rin)
Sabay tayong mangangarap
Ng nakaraan sa `tin

[chorus]
Ang nakalipas ay ibabalik natin ooh
Ipapaalala ko sa `yoAng aking pangakoNa ang pag-ibig ko’y laging sa ‘yo

Kahit maputi na ang buhok ko

Empty

2011-12-07T04:22:00.001-08:00

I don't know why I suddenly feel so empty all of a sudden:(

I don't like change!

Time have changed a lot of the people I love

and it feels different with the 'new' them...

I shall be happy right?

There's a lot of reason for me to smile...

To laugh...

But till I find those reasons I shall be my normal self for now.

Random

2011-12-06T04:34:00.001-08:00

Nothing can ever replace that feeling that your loved ones can give right?

It's nice to be spending a lot of time with my family

since I'm not that busy with trainings

Christmas is coming and there's a lot of stuff that I wanna do!

Xmas cards for those people who are really special to me,

Xmas presents for mom and dad, kuya and some of my friends!

Kuya and I are planning to bake cupcakes for Xmas!:D

I just realized how much I'll miss this country

though I really wanna get out of here like NOW!

Well humans will never ever be satisfied right

We always want things that are not present in our life right?

Like for example once I'm in Canada

I would want to be someone else!

If you get what I mean...

So many people have changed

and so have I guessed?:/

Well changing comes with time right?

and its something that can never be stopped!

Oh well facts about life...

T.G.I.F

2011-12-01T08:35:00.000-08:00

Thank God It's Friday!!!!
Though it's not the end of the week yet
I'm already damn tired...
Tired from Frisbee work and more work.
I don't even get it why I'm so tired from my work
when I haven't even study for CTs yet!
Shall start studying tmr
I must score well for IFF on tues coz it's 5 credit!
And I really like Daniel Tay!:D
He's funny though he takes
damn long to start his lecture!

So this will be my schedule for next week;
Monday: presentation for EBA
Tuesday: IFF test, training
Wednesday: SAP practical
Thursday: SAP theory test and idk what its about:/
Friday: Thank God there's nothing on Friday!

My group have not started on IFF project,
GPS project!!!
And luckily there's no project for Bstats
if not I really don't know how I'll survive the
rest of the semester!
I must do well this semester
if not my Mommy will push the blame
to the fact that I'm spending a lot of time on Frisbee:(
I can't let that happen so...
NEVINE MAE DIALA ACOTANZA
YOU BETTER START STUDYING
FOR YOUR CTS AND START ACTUALLY
DOING YOUR PROJECTS!!!!!

DADDY GOD HELP ME CONQUER THIS TERM!
And after that I shall have a good holiday by
going overseas and working my ass off
for training and work
so that I would be able to go for Malaysia Opens
*hopefully* *cross-fingers*

Shall sleep now!
Will be another long day tmr!
With DSS presentation!:D
Praying that everything will go well!
Really love DSS and of course K K Leong:D

I Love You. Thank You. I'm Sorry

2011-11-30T07:29:00.000-08:00

"I Love You...

for who you are,

Thank You...

for being alive,

I'm Sorry...

for my imperfections."

The sweetest thing I've ever heard...

I Wanna Travel!!!

2011-11-24T07:19:00.000-08:00

I wanna travel around the world!!

And I really wanna see these 2:D

And the grand canyon

and the rock where the faces of the president's are

the one shown in national treasure!

and i wanna go Switzerland, Netherlands,

Germany, Paris, France, United Kingdom, Cambodia,

Vietnam, NEPAL, Japan, Korea, Moscow,

HIMALAYAS, Beijing, Taiwan, Israel, Egypt,

Tasmania, Queensland, Spain, Denmark, Norway,

Sweden, Finland, Brazil, Argentina, Maldives!

Really wanna go to all these places before I die!

Farewell:D

2011-11-21T21:29:00.000-08:00

Seriously no mood at all to do any of my work
Well at least I did my EBA quiz which I passed
and thank God it's just 4%...
Doing my notes last semester wasn't this torturous:(

Okay shall talk about Farewell which happened last week:D
Was FINALLY back in SMSS after a really really long time
I miss the school, the teachers, well basically everything.
When you're in secondary school
You will think that it is the most difficult phase of your life
Well think again guys...
Poly and JC are out there to kill us even more:(
Shall talk about that later...
So we had Canadian pizza thanks to Ms Lum:D
I swear the pizzas were gone in less than 5 minutes!!!:(
But thank God there were satays and crabsticks^^
It was nice catching up with the juniors
Knowing which schools they will be heading to next year
though it is still kinda early.
Took lots of pictures and I hope I'll be able to upload it soon...
Played honey if you love will you smile for me:)
haha seriously love that game but the juniors weren't enthu enough:(
And that game seriously made me MISS MY SENIORS:(
so yeah that's basically what happened
that 4 hours in my life passed by really fast w/o me even knowing it...
AND THAT'S HOW MUCH I MISS SMSS D;

Storm~

2011-11-13T06:51:00.001-08:00

"And once the storm is over

you won't remember how you've survived it through.

You won't even be sure in fact

whether the storm is really over.

But one thing is certain.

When you come out of the storm

you won't be the same person who walked in,

that's what this storm is about"

Szelin just sent this through whatsapp

and it's funny how it got my thoughts running.

We face way too many storm in our life.

Its as if its a cycle that we are already immune too.

But storms makes us stronger to face a even stronger storm.

If you get what I mean.

This week is really crazy.

It passed way too fast for some of us.

Regrets

Happiness

Sadness

and Friendships

are the words that define this week.

It's funny how the 5 of us forgets all our worries

when we see each other.

How we forget whatever hurtful stuff

we said or did to one another as it vanishes from our mind.

How we just enjoy each other's company.

We don't choose any specific time or place

to just laugh to our hearts content.

Yesterday meant a lot to me.

Coz it showed me that actually I still do care.

Though I will never forget

I still know that you are still someone special to me.

That you are still actually a part of this.

I'm just thankful to have the 4 of you in my life.

And I just pray that everything will still stay the same<3

Pol-ite was an eye-opener to me.

It really brought me to a different level.

I learnt a lot be it mentally, skills or physically.

There's still so much I have to do

before finally being who I wanna be.

There's a lot of fears within me that I have to overcome.

And till I overcome them then can I move on to another level.

There's a lot I wanna say but some things are better left unsaid right?

Complications

2011-11-01T07:40:00.000-07:00

I'm supposed to be doing my work right now but I'm lazy:/

It just got to me that life is quite simple

As all we need to survive is to sleep, eat and drink!

Life gets complicated when we tend to complicate it.

As in God just adds certain ingredients in our life

to make it more interesting.

Sugar- happy memories

Salt- sad memories

And the rest are challenges that comes our way

Now this challenges, its up to us on how we are gonna face it

Are we actually gonna fight it or we're gonna let it fight us instead?

The mushroom drill taught me a lot just now

What's the use of getting all so worked up and stuff

It's time that we all actually enjoy the drills we are doing!

As in we are playing Ultimate because we love it in some way or another right?

And let's pick each other up whenever someone falls down!

Haha am I even making sense here?:/

Okay I shall get back to work.

Different~

2011-10-26T07:45:00.000-07:00

This is the latest time I've ever slept I guess
It feels different studying with a goal in mind
It's just that you at least try your best to listen during lectures
well except for the time that the lecture is really not cooperating
of course where he just bore you in class:(
and of course do your tutorials on time haha
with the exception of today I guess:/

Okay my goal for this Sem is to get at least a 3.7/8
and also to teach Trina with calculations!

Well for Frisbee like everyone of course to win every game
but that is not specific enough
I really wanna improve
I don't want Pol-ite to be like SUO(a wasted opportunity)
I wanna catch every disc
Fight hard for every disc
Run for every point I play
AND MOST OF ALL NOT WASTE THI OPPORTUNITY
AND REGRET IN THE END LIKE A SORE LOSER!

okay time to sleep now it's way past my bedtime:(
I pray that tomorrow will be a better day
by nevertheless Daddy God I really thank you for today!~

Changes in my life...

2011-10-17T08:40:00.000-07:00

It's been a long time since i last updated this blog.

Well it's just a warning that this post will really be long.

Was just talking to Chia and I was inspired to come here and post.

This song really got me thinking;

Rainbow Connection

Why are there so many songs about rainbows
And what's on the other side?
Rainbows are visions, but only illusions,
And rainbows have nothing to hide.
So we've been told and some choose to believe it
I know they're wrong, wait and see.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection,
The lovers, the dreamers and me.

Who said that every wish would be heard and answered
when wished on the morning star?
Somebody thought of that
and someone believed it,
and look what it's done so far.
What's so amazing that keeps us stargazing?
And what do we think we might see?
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection,
the lovers, the dreamers and me.

All of us under its spell,
we know that it's probably magic....

Have you been half asleep
and have you heard voices?
I've heard them calling my name.
Is this the sweet sound that calls the young sailors?
The voice might be one and the same.
I've heard it too many times to ignore it.
It's something that I'm supposed to be.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection,
the lovers, the dreamers and me.

Just got back last Sunday morning from our trip.

The place wasn't the main factor why I had awesome time there.

Yeah it's the US and Canada

but what's more important is who you're with right?:)

So yeah me having fun there is a known fact.

And all our future was planned there.

And let's just say that my future is pushing me to work hard!

So after Poly, I'm gonna do my bond for 2 years

and then apply as an immigrant in Canada.

Where I'll do my degree and help out in the business as well.

After that I MUST do my MBA!

That's a thing that I must do before I die.

I'm not being over-reactive or anything but MBA is my no.1 goal for now.

I don't know why but I just can't see myself growing old here

with a family and kids.

It's not that I hate this place or anything

There's a lot in this place that I have to be grateful about.

This is the place where I found true friends,

friends who won't be making use of you (well except for certain times).

That's my future, it has been planned and it must be executed starting today:)

First day of school today wasn't bad.

Just went for 2 hours, 10am-12pm.

And the lecturer was talking way too slow!

It got me feeling more sleepy!

First training tmr since I left.

Kinda scared for it.

Honestly, I didn't expect to be in Pol-ite.

Now that I'm given this opportunity

I shall not waste it and just make full use of it.

There's a lot that you have given yet I'm not

the most faithful and loyal Christian you can find around.

I really wanna go back to choir

but I just can't bring myself to do it.

Yeah let's just say I'm a coward and stuff.

I love singing and what more singing Christian songs.

But do lead the way for me, Lord.

I know you are in control and I lift everything up to you:)

Random~

2011-08-15T08:23:00.000-07:00

I don't know why but I don't have much stuff to say here anymore

Last time my blog was like my diary

Maybe because I'm just way too busy to even come here:(

So now is the 15th of August

Will be having my first paper on Friday

Then Tuesday, Wednesday and finally last paper on Friday:D

Then will be going for bonding camp for 3 days 2 nights I guess:/

During the holidays I'll be busy with trainings and work!

I need to work because I need the money to shop in US!

Can't always be using Mom's money:(

I'm a big girl now and I'll prove that to her

Coz she still thinks that I'm a kid:(

So yeah will be leaving on the 29th of September

But we'll only be there for 2 weeks:(

SUCKS BIG TIME!!! D;

Can't wait for next year!!!

Cruise for Kuya's 21st:D

Since that is his wish so my parents decided to go for the Mediterranean Cruise:D

Then Europe trip during the September holidays^^

Been wanting to go Europe since forever!!!

But Kuya won't be there because by then he'll be in NS already:(

But I'm sure there'll be a lot of other opportunities for us to go back there again:D

Okay time to sleeo now:)

Need to be in school tmr at 9;(

Then leave by 4 plus coz I need to accompany Mom in town tmr!

random~

2011-08-04T10:30:00.000-07:00

haven't really been blogging for a long time:(

okay I was just reading someone's blog

and it inspired me to work hard in Poly!

I mean I wanna get into University

and in order to do that the only solution is to work hard

and I don't like the fact that I keep disappointing my parents:(

How I wish I was just born smart!

That way life would be so much easier!

But I'm sure God have a great plan for me!

As for now, I shall just give in my 101% in everything I do.

Be it tutorials, projects, exams, test.

ACOTANZA NEVINE MAE DIALA YOU CAN DO IT!!!

One chapter of my Poly life is about to end.

That's how fast time flies~

I MUST MAKE SURE THAT I HAVE A CHOICE ON

WHERE TO GO AFTER GRADUATION!

To the point where I can choose which Uni I wanna go to!

With God nothing is impossible~

Gonna treasure every moment in Poly!

No regrets upon graduation~

Not gonna have the feeling that I had when I collected my

O level result!!!!

Learnt something from IS project!

It's freaking important to choose your group-mates

I'll never allow any of my group mates to pull down

my marks ever again!

I mean it's okay if you're doing your role!

But the thing is that the kind of research that all of you gives

me is just.....

And you'll react in the middle of the presentation that

there's such information inside?!

WTS!!!!

Oh well what is done is done right?

So move on and just forget about it?

But at least this experience has taught me a great lesson~

Okay shall continue doing my project

I still need to wake up early to meet my group!

Hope it'll be a productive session and we'll finish it up!

So that we won't be meeting up on Saturday

coz I really need that day to study for DGCH

which I haven't started on:(

2011-07-28T09:10:00.001-07:00

"Nothing's gonna change my love for you,
you ought to know by now how much I love you!"

So I don't get it why you don't believe me!
and it's annoying!

Guess it's back:)

2011-06-27T05:37:00.000-07:00

I learnt one important lesson during our first match yesterday.

Though I just played for one point

It was all still worth it

It brought back the motivation I had for Ultimate.

I'm going to make sure that whenever I'm playing

I'm gonna give my all

Gonna run like there's no tomorrow

I'm not going to bother about the sun anymore

Not going to bother about the aches from previous trainings

It's all in the mind

I'll make sure that I'll have that mentality I had for netball

It's all in the mind!!!!!!

and MIND OVER BODY!!!!!

So yeah it was the first day of school today

I felt like how almost everyone felt today

SIAN...

but school was not that bad today

Maths lesson was funny!!!

ISL practical was damn slack

Got back my ISL paper during tutorial

Was kinda shock that I got 87/100

I couldn't believe my eyes

I thought they were playing tricks on me

Coz I thought I screwed up my MRP

Went home after that:)

And what do I do when I reach home early?

SLEEP!!!

So yeah slept my whole afternoon away

Coz I'm really tried from frisbee:/

Cloud Nine

2011-06-17T08:21:00.001-07:00

I thank God for giving me these friends:)

One of the reasons why I'm able to survive here in Singapore

They are the ones who brought so much

joy/laughter/memories in my life:)

Without them my life would be kinda boring

Okay not really boring but yeah it'll be different.

Though we often argue over small matters

We come back together stronger!!!

So met these idiots today

Had lunch in Novena

Jamie and I had Saba fish if I'm not wrong

It damn GOOD!!!!

First time I ate it:D

And I had ice longan!!!!

After that went to Shaw Plaza to look for boots

but they had limited sets there

so we need to go boots hunting again some other day

Then went to Szelin's place after that

But Trina and I had a special mission to do first

The place we went was close

So Trina and I went to 7 eleven first

I told her I'll pay for it but the budget is $8.20

because my money in my account was $---8.20

But we spent $8.40!!! that gives me more reason to spend:(

Then we saw this mangosteen and rambutan

So being us we decided to buy it and surprise them:)

Played monopoly deal and watched movie in her place.

Headed to TTSH after that.

Dad bought for me Mr. Bean:) (tricia be jealous)

In the car we were talking about his awaited Ipad

haha it's funny how Dad is so excited.

It's like he just can't wait to get that Ipad on his hand.

So yeah that's basically what I did today.

I can't slack anymore next week

There's a lot of projects to be dome:(

and not to forget my notes:(

My whole body is still aching from the game yesterday.

Seriously need to get my stamina back.

Won't be going for training tmr

So that means I need to jog on Sunday/Monday.

Tiring day

2011-06-16T08:35:00.000-07:00

Had training today from 9-4

9-11 had training

11-4 game against RJC

and we lost to them by 1(13-12)

It was seriously damn tiring

and I couldn't run properly coz of my damn shoes

That's why I need to buy my boots tmr^^

So tmr I'm going sportslink and queensway:)

and I'm having lunch with the twins, jamie and maybe szelin

I'm damn sleepy but I'm sacrificing my sleep

coz I'm skipping with Trina Young Xin

and she's being damn lame!!!!

Forever & A Day...

2011-06-15T10:56:00.000-07:00

"What if all you have is today,

Are you still willing to take a chance on Love... "

No clue...

2011-06-15T10:21:00.001-07:00

I still don't know what to get Daddy

for Father's Day:(

Would a hug and a kiss be enough for you Daddy?:D

I can't really get you the Ipad can I?

I'm not as rich as Kuya:(

Nevermind, I'll think of something meaningful.

How precious could 1 minute be?

2011-06-15T10:01:00.000-07:00

Haha okay so much for not updating

this blog anymore

okay anyway was watching a movie

with my brother just now.

I forgot the movie title so yeah.

"what would you do if you find out that

you have less than a minute to live?"

That's a question that I don't even know how to answer.

I bet all of you would be saying

'I'll call my parents and tell them that I love them,

and say sorry to them etc...'

That's kinda a cliche guys

But seriously what will be that one last thing

you would do on Earth before you die?

Coz that last act of yours may be

something that you'll be remembered for.

This is how much a movie/drama can affect me

Because for me every drama/movie has a story to tell

And that story may change us to be someone else

Someone better, who have a deeper understanding

on the real meaning of life itself.

Haha okay I should just shut up and sleep

Hope I'll be able to wake up at 3.30

and catch the Eclipse

but by the looks of it, its like 1.15am now

and I'm still wide awake

and I still need to wake up at 6

coz Daddy is leaving at around 6.25:(

Daddy and Kuya will be buying an Ipad each

Time to persuade Daddy to give me his:)

He doesn't really need it that much right?:)

Okay Mae it's time for you to work wonders.

Fulifilled

2011-06-15T07:27:00.000-07:00

Training tomorrow at West Coast Park

I don't really know how to go there

So I'm going to Jamie's place first:)

Frisbee is quite interesting

It's not just about running and throwing

There's a lot of thinking in the game

And the most important thing is

Team Work and Communication

I guess.

Went to Ooi's house the other day

We started singing Christian songs

And the feeling is just great

Its like you can seriously feel him there with you

It gives you a sense of belonging and happiness:D

It's not something you feel in your everyday life

You'll only feel it when you lift everything up to him.

And most of the time we only do that when we are troubled.

So why not we lift our whole life to him

Be it something good or bad:)

Don't think I'll be updating this blog as often

Just don't have anything to say

Whenever I get here:/

2011-06-15T07:23:00.001-07:00

LOVE;

its something you can never measure

you just keep giving

and you'll never know whether its enough

There's just this empty feeling inside of me

2011-06-14T21:38:00.000-07:00

In my heart we are together everyday

Forever and a Day

2011-06-11T21:52:00.000-07:00

It took me a day to fall in love with you,

but it will take me forever to say good-bye.

Finally over

2011-06-08T06:54:00.000-07:00

Haven't really been in the best of mood

for the past few weeks/days?

That's because of my parent's

I'm not really blaming them or anything

I know its my fault too

But sometimes can parents seriously

think about our feelings when they are scolding us.

They just keep scolding and scolding

not knowing what they're saying is hurting us.

Tita talked me yesterday

I just want you to know that I'm thankful

I really am:D

Tomorrow is my SOM test.

Which is freaking 20%

Didn't wanted to study for it at first

But after seeing that it's 20%

I quickly switched on my Mac.

Hope I do well.

SOM is one module that I seriously don't get:/

So plans for this week and next week;

Thursday:

*going to town

*meeting chia at peonage place for lunch

*studying after that

Friday:

*going to do DT Lab 2 in school

*gonna go back to SMSS

*dinner with 4e3:D

*Ms Seng's farewell

Saturday:

*training:D

*going to swim in Jurong East:D

Sunday:

*church

*shop and celebrate Father's Day:)

*back to work:D

Monday, Wednesday, Friday:

*work

Tuesday, Thursday, Saturrday:

*training

Sunday:

*family day

Dragon boating:)

2011-06-04T09:30:00.000-07:00

Went dragon boating at Kallang today:D

Was quite fun:)

We rowed all the way to the Merlion there.

Went to Tita Tess place after that

Haha Patrick was on the bicycle and i was at the back

then we were pulling kuya on the trolley.

It was damn funny!!!!

We were having so much fun.

Then they caught a frog.

So we wanted to put it in a plastic bag

But before putting it inside the frog decided to pee

The kids were all damn scared of the frog

But we released it after awhile

Then Max was carrying a plastic bag

She went to Allain and put it near his face

Haha he started crying because he thought

that the frog was inside.

LOL

Seriously couldn't stop laughing.

Had a fun time just now

though I'm still kinda sick

And my voice is still damn bad:(

Can't wait to go Jurong East next week:D

Dreams

2011-06-04T09:15:00.000-07:00

I want my dreams to turn into reality.

When I grow up I wanna travel around the world

I wanna see all the wonders that God has created

I wanna travel to all the places that I haven't gone before

Be it alone, with my family, friends.

I wanna see what the world looks like on the other side.

Yes, this is my dream for now

but I'll make sure that one day it'll turn into a reality.

I forgot how it feels like to be happy.

I'm happy most of the time that I question myself

if that is really what happiness is all about.

HAPPY;

delighted, pleased, or glad, as over a particular thing: to behappy to see a person.

A lot of people say that I'm childish

but it is through my childishness that I really

enjoy the simplest thing in life.

It's like a having a mind of a kid;

pure innocence .

So don't blame me for being childish

Its just my way of being a child again

Because when all of us grows up

We just wish if we can all be a child again right?

Sick

2011-06-02T18:11:00.000-07:00

I'm skipping SOM lecture today:(

Woke up at 7 just now and I just wasn't feeling well

Having cough, flu, fever and what I hate the most

is that my throat really hurts!!!!

So I'll just go to school around 11 and study all the way for DT.

On a happier note;

Jamie and I got in the summer league team

It was kinda expected but Jamie was still damn shock and all

She called me and she just can't control her excitement

It just shows how much she loves frisbee:D

Now that I know I'm in summer league

Nevine Mae is gonna aim for Polite training squad now:D

On a even happier note;

Jamie, Trina, maybe Szelin and I will be going soghurt later.

Though I won't be able to eat I'm just happy I can hang-out

with these idiots:D and maybe Lynette will drop-by too:)

Haven't really talk to Lynette in a long time.

I'm just glad that this week is over

3 damn a lot of memorizing test down

and 2 more to go next week:D

Maths on Tuesday:D and SOM on Thurs:)

That means Thursday marks the end of my common test week:D

and it's time to party after that!!!!

Okay not really party:(

because I have to go back to school for training

every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday:D

that means I'll be working every Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Sunday:D

Can't wait to go back to work.

I just miss all the people there:D

Haha my brother just came in and asked

G: You got no school today?

M: Have but I'm not going for my first lecture.

(then I gave my sick face)

G: Woah you know how to skip lecture now ah.

(then he seriously just hit my head:()

okay time to study for DT.

It's one in a million...

2011-05-29T06:38:00.000-07:00

Can I have this dance?
Take my hand, take a breath
Pull me close and take one step
Keep your eyes locked on mine,
And let the music be your guide.

Won't you promise me (now won't you promise me, that you'll never forget)
We'll keep dancing (to keep dancing) wherever we go next

It's like catching lightning the chances of finding someone like you
It's one in a million, the chances of feeling the way we do
And with every step together, we just keep on getting better
So can I have this dance (can I have this dance)
Can I have this dance

Take my hand, I'll take the lead
And every turn will be safe with me
Don't be afraid, afraid to fall
You know I'll catch you threw it all

And you can't keep us apart (even a thousand miles, can't keep us apart)
'Cause my heart is (cause my heart is) wherever you are

It's like catching lightning the chances of finding someone like you
It's one in a million, the chances of feeling the way we do
And with every step together, we just keep on getting better
So can I have this dance (can I have this dance)
Can I have this dance

Oh no mountains too high enough, oceans too wide
'Cause together or not, our dance won't stop
Let it rain, let it pour
What we have is worth fighting for
You know I believe, that we were meant to be

It's like catching lightning the chances of finding someone like you (like you)
It's one in a million, the chances of feeling the way we do (way we do)
And with every step together, we just keep on getting better
So can I have this dance (can I have this dance)
Can I have this dance

Can I have this dance
Can I have this dance

Everytime I hear this song it'll always remind me of you.
I just hope that you're always safe.
I wouldn't dare ask for more.

2011-05-29T06:28:00.002-07:00

Disappointed

2011-05-25T09:52:00.000-07:00

Sometimes no matter how much

I want things to happen,

all I can do is wait.

And usually, waiting is the hardest part.

IMY~

Best Friends For Life~

2011-05-21T05:31:00.000-07:00

Had fun with Jamie Tan today:D

We had training in the morning

but halfway through it started raining:(

It's okay if it was just training but there was lighting too

So that means we need to get inside

Because the lighting system can detect if

there are anyone still in the field and it'll make lots of noise.

My brother and Jamie had to 'practice'

for their badminton tournament this Wednesday at 6.

Went upstairs to have lunch first then after that

I played frisbee with Jamie:D

I thought her how to throw backhand properly

and she thought me how to throw forehand:)

This is called a win-win situation:D

Time passes so fast when we were playing frisbee

Haha I think Frisbee is my life now:D

Like how Netball was my life last time.

Okay not really life but yeah you know what I mean.

Jamie created a twitter account for me

so yeah follow me @nevinemae:D

Frisbee FTW!:D

2011-05-19T07:14:00.000-07:00

So I just got back home from frisbee awhile ago.

Though there were lesser people today because of the TCP.

Training was still fun though I was gonna die.

So today I found out that I have a good

chance getting into summer league:)

And from here I'll work double hard for POL-ITE:D

Today had lunch with Trina after IS.

It was just freaking funny.

Coz Thomas(Trina's China friend~not being racist here)

joined us for lunch and he doesn't really understand

English which means we are tuning in to Channel 8.

He kept talking to me in Chinese and I just

kept looking at Trina and just laugh.

Oh well I had a good laugh during lunch:)

Joke for the day:

Brenna: Is Jamie going for training?

Me: They have to attend the ECP.

( It was suppose to be TCP)

Brenna: They are going East Coast Park?!?!

I was like with?!

Brenna you're seriously a joke.

But I still love you:)

It's fun having your company for frisbee and lectures:)

2011-05-18T06:46:00.000-07:00

I laughed and said, “Life is easy.”

What I meant was, “Life’s easy with you here, and when you leave, it’s hard again.

Thank God for friends:D

2011-05-17T05:50:00.001-07:00

last friday;

Had dinner with Jamie and Szelin at NYNY:)

It has been a really long time since i last saw Szelin.

It was great to catch up with that girl

and just know what's happening in her life:D

Today I wanted to watch the match against NUS

but my Mommy was kinda against me going

to the twins place. SO plan failed:d

But the good news is that

NPU WON!!!

17-12:D

So around 1 plus headed down to Burger Shack:)

Is that how you spell it?

Oh well who cares.

It was great to see Chia:)

Been a really long time since I last saw that girl.

Is one month considered long?

Oh well it is to me:D

Then i had to follow Trina Young Xin

to the salon to cut her hair.

Of all freaking day she chose today!!!!

But i was being a good friend so I let her bring me around:)

Am I nice or what?:)

Then I met Mel, Sarah and Sam in the restaurant

beside Starbucks haha those idiots

were waiting for 3 pm to come coz the Frappucino

in Starbucks will be half price:)

Headed down to the Twins place after that.

Had fun playing Frisbee and 'Netball':D

Then we had to change and Trina brought down

all her SMSS PE shirts.

So all of us wore PE shirts haha.

PAP FTW!!! (inside joke)

Can't wait for June holidays to come:)

We'll be going Sentosa and Jurong East to swim.

When I was walking back home just now.

I saw these 2 kids playing with their Father.

They were playing with bubbles.

And the floor was filled with the bubbles:)

How I wish I was that child playing there that moment.

I miss being a child.

I'll miss:

Your sweet embrace,

The soft touch of your lips on my forehead.

But I know that this is only temporary.

So as for now I'll wait patiently for the day

of seeing you again to come.

I MISS YOU SO MUCH MY LITTLE ANGEL!<3

♥

2011-05-14T09:39:00.000-07:00

I'm afraid to fall in love.

After hearing some of my friends

relationship problem

its like I'm asking myself a lot of questions.

I'm afraid that I'll be in the same position as them.

As much as I'm giving them advices and stuff

deep inside I know that when you're

already in a relationship

you'll just give your 100% right?

Like you'll love the guy whole-heartedly

and you'll love them to the extent

that you won't reserve any for yourself.

But what if one day you'll realize that

he's not the right one for you?

What will happen to you?

How are you gonna get back on your feet

when you gave him everything?

I guess its just a cycle.

You love someone and if he's not the right

one for you, you'll break up.

And this cycle will continue until you

find the right guy for you.

RAINBOW CONNECTION

Why are there so many songs about rainbows
and what's on the other side?
Rainbows are visions, but only illusions,
and rainbows have nothing to hide.
So we've been told and some choose to believe it.
I know they're wrong, wait and see.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.

Who said that every wish would be heard
and answered when wished on the morning star?
Somebody thought of that and someone believed it.
Look what it's done so far.
What's so amazing that keeps us star gazing
and what do we think we might see?
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.

All of us under its spell. We know that it's probably magic.

Have you been half asleep and have you heard voices?
I've heard them calling my name.
Is this the sweet sound that called the young sailors.
The voice might be one and the same.
I've heard it too many times to ignore it.
It's something that I'm supposed to be.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.

Loving my life:D

2011-05-06T22:49:00.000-07:00

Like what I said on fb

"Poly life is not that slack after all"

It's like tutorials after tutorials

and I have a project to do for every module I take:/

Oh well, I'm sure I'll be able to survive:D

He won't be putting us in a situation

that we can't handle right?:)

Haha I don't know why but I've just been

so positive about everything and life

for the past few days/weeks:)

So yeah I'm joining Ultimate Frisbee:D

I seriously love Ultimate

It's something new

It's fun especially having Brenna, Chan and Jamie

there and of course Joy and Wen Ling too:)

It's like we are just laughing at

everything and anything:)

and there's this group of guys there and

I swear they are freaking hilarious.

But I hope the numbers will go down soon

so that we can really get down to the real training.

Yesterday I went for BA Envoys interview:/

I don't think I'll get in for it

and I'm kinda fine with it

because if they are the kind of seniors I'll be working with

I rather not get in.

Who burps in the middle of an interview

and says sorry but still laugh and make fun of it?!

Seriously you're doing an interview so be profession about it.

Okay I guess this is the first time I'm saying this on my blog.

I'm just so happy that I'm single and being in a relationship

is the last thing I want to do as for now.

I just wanna enjoy being single for now and I'll just wait

for the right guy to come.

I hope that when he comes I'm ready to be in a serious relationship:D

Haha this is really random but yeah that's what I'm really

feeling after talking to some of my friends about

their relationships.

Though you guys get sad and stuff I'm sure they

bring so much joy and happiness in your life too.

And i bet the joy they bring is double the headache and

heartache they give you guys.

So just hang in there if you really LOVE that person!!!:D

I'm one good love guru right?:) Haha.

A day to remember.

2011-04-30T12:09:00.000-07:00

I guess tonight was one of the craziest night of my life!!!

though I'm damn sleepy already

I just have to blog everything that happened just now.

So first we went to eat at the Filipino restaurant

then we walked towards Thai embassy

to go to this bar, BLOWNFISH

if i remember correctly:/

SO THIS IS WHERE THE FUN BEGAN!!!!

I think they ordered 5 tower of beer

and that is freaking a lot.

So when they got a bit tipsy

they started letting loose

then my all of them started dancing

like there's no tomorrow.

Then there were this dancing part where

the dancers had to separate and they had a mini stage

all my uncles started watching it and they were

dancing along that was freaking funny.

Then they forced my brother to dance with her also

though my brother was damn reluctant

he didn't really have a choice.

After that they just kept partying from like

9.25 to 2.30am

yup we were there for 5 freaking hours.

Everyone was just really in the party mood.

So we left and they decided to drink coffee

haha and of all places they choose TCC.

This is where the drama begins.

Everyone was just drunk and they were making

a lot of noise already.

So we went in and ordered and we were just

damn noisy, then this new zealand guy

approached our table and told us to keep quiet.

Seriously you wouldn't want to be there in that point of time.

The reaction of my uncles were just.......

I can't even describe it.

At that moment I didn't even know what i was feeling.

I was kinda nervous, embarrass yet excited and thrilled.

I mean it's wrong for him to do that and what more

to say it in that tone. Coz anybody will get offended.

What more it is a public place so he doesn't really have

any rights to do that.

All of them were just freaking funny.

Instead of us being embarrassed by what he did,

in the end he's the one who got embarrassed

and he left the place.

My uncle was like 'So what if you're white.

You think you're the boss here?!'

Then all the swearing and shit came in.

If this is what happened just now

then I don't know what to say for later.

Coz later during dinner everyone will be coming over.

If they only drank beer just now and got drunk

what more if they're drinking hard tonight.

Yet another crazy night for me...

ILY MOMMY!!!!!

2011-04-24T06:45:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMY!!!

I guess I'm the luckiest kid in the world

coz I have a mom like you:)

I thank God every night for knowing

such a caring and loving

person like you.

Words is not enough to tell the world

how much I love you Mommy.

Even if I were to die today and

be re-born someday

I would still want you to be my mom.

I'm sorry that I'm not the

most perfect daughter you can find.

For not being able to meet your expectations

of me most of the time.

"I'm a host of imperfection but you see pass all that."

And because of that I'm really grateful.

You never get tired reminding me

time after time

not to do this and that.

Thanks for not only being my mom

but also for being my number 1 best friend.

Even if the whole world would have turn their

backs on me I know you will be there for me:)

ILYSM MOMMY!!!!

I don't know what life would be

without you, dad and kuya.

And of course the rest of the people i love:)

so mom finally agreed to let

kuya and I to go Canada first this September

since our holiday starts at the

end of August:)

she was like you guys can work there

and we were like wthck-.-

luckily she was joking

actually she better be joking.

so as of now I'm gonna be studying

till June then we have a 2 weeks break

then after that 7 weeks of studying

then it'll be a 7 week of holiday:)

is that cool or what:)

kinda excited for Poly to start:)

suppose to to have softball training tmr

but we have to celebrate Mom's birthday tmr

tues: I start at 10:) but i end at 6:(

then ultimate training:)

weds: i start at 9 and end at 1:)

have to go for some talk

then softball training at 5:)

thurs: i start at 8 and end at 12:)

cool or what?:)

fri: start at 9 and end at 4:)

kinda like my timetable:)

with at least having a 1 hour or more

break every day.

MAKAN PLACE!!!!!!

facing reality

2011-04-22T06:34:00.000-07:00

okay I just log-out of Mel and NPal

I feel like I'm really a Poly student now

how my life will start revolving around

lectures, tutorials, ccas and other commitment

you may think that this is secondary school

all over again but seriously poly life

is so different from sec school life

I'm kinda scared actually

as much as I'm excited to meet my class

and make new friends and stuff like that

but deep inside there's this fear

I'm so use to life w/o homework and

projects how if I can't handle all the stress?

but whatever happens

at least I know I have friends who

I can confide in though it'll comfort me

only for awhile at least it'll make me forget

the reality that all of us have to face

this is the harsh reality of life i guess

and its time i get use to it.

quiz on the first day of school

on a maths

at least its a maths if not I won't

really bother about it.

at least at I end at 2.

mommy's birthday is on Sunday:)

don't really know how to surprise her.

over you

2011-04-21T08:51:00.000-07:00

i love talking to pris:D

she just changes my mindset

whenever i'm confused about something:D

and yup to answer the question just now,

i can finally say that

I REALLY DON'T LIKE YOU:D

i'm happy that i feel this way...

what are words♥

2011-04-21T07:55:00.000-07:00

i love the song what are words

so one night i just kept

playing this song

not being emo and stuff

but i just felt listening to it:)

then on fb my brother

put his status as

'i'll keep my angel close'

Glenn Ross Acotanza nooooo. see my angel on my dp!

when he said that

it kinda hit me on how much i miss them

it just feel so different

when they are not here anymore

but its okay i'm gonna see you guys

real soon:)

imy♥

poly life

2011-04-21T06:38:00.000-07:00

BAOW is not that bad

i mean yes it was awkward at first

but that's a phase that you need

to go through right?:)

luckily for my case

the girls are all damn friendly

so i didn't really have a hard time

making new friends:)

school officially starts next week

kinda excited for it:)

sucky feeling...

2011-04-21T04:49:00.000-07:00

i don't get it why i can't get you out of my mind

but one thing i know only time would tell

when i'll get over you...

actually the question is

do i really like you?

happy to have you:)

2011-04-18T07:55:00.001-07:00

thank you so much:)

you don't know how much this means to me

ily♥

blessed...

2011-04-17T07:58:00.001-07:00

i love it how whenever i'm done

some random person will talk to me

and cheer me up:)

actually not a random person

but its just nice to know that

even though you're going through something

God is still there and he sends

someone to be with you:)

to share your burden with you:)

cool right?:)

2011-04-17T05:38:00.000-07:00

I'm tired I really am.

You wanna try being in my position

even if its just 1 day.

Coz i would like to be somebody else for a day.

finally 18...

2011-04-15T22:06:00.000-07:00

i have not been blogging for a really long time.

i've been so busy for the past few weeks

that i don't really have time to come here anymore

i guess my birthday this year was the worst birthday ever

i can't believe i cried on my birthday

not coz im happy but coz im so freaking pissed

i shall not elaborate on that since its over

the best thing about my birthday this year

is MY RELATIVES:)

tita, jr, rachelle, ate, lola, nanay, rj, and of course queintin

and my FAMILY:)

as long as they are all beside me

i wouldn't dare ask for more

they are the best gift God has given me

my party was all right i guess.

chia thanks so much for being my mc:)

you don't know how much i appreciate it

haha after that day my relatives

won't stop telling me how much they love me you ass

i think they love you more than they love me:(

the next day we went WWW:)

the kids really had a lot of fun

and that's the whole purpose of going there

rachelle is damn scared of water

she was like 'i don't like it!!!!'

and jr just love the water.

we went USS the next day

the mummy ride is the best

haha jr was freaking scared

haha sitting beside him was the best thing ever

he was not even screaming

his facial expression throughout the ride was just priceless

and tita is als another one

haha when the ride stopped and went backwards

she was like oh!!! her face was damn funny

but i love the water thing also

tita got wet like shit haha

didn't go on the galactica coz i was kinda giddy

had dinner at saizeriya that night

it felt nice seeing everyone again:)

i just miss them so much!!!!

went to batam on weds till thurs

i love batam!!

i don't mind staying there:)

stayed at holiday inn

haha if we did not have enough space in traders

in holiday inn we had so much space

coz we booked 2 suites which have 2 rooms inside

and a normal room

played water polo in the swimming pool

had lots of fun there

i will never ever forget that day

we were playing like there's no tmr

we only stopped coz jr vomited in the swimming pool

went up and ate

we had room service coz we were too lazy to go down and eat

on the way back to singapore

it was raining like shit

so the waves were kinda big

it was damn scary

fri was just a damn sad day

in the morning we had to send ate off

as much as i tried stop myself from crying

it just have to come out;(

i'm really gonna miss you ate

thanks for everything!!!!!

words are really not enough to tell you

how much i love you!!

i really wish you can join us in canada this oct:)

then in the afternoon

i had to send tita, jr and rachelle off

it was the first time i saw my brother cry

when somebody is leaving

he's not that type of person who cries easily

so yup this is another crying time

but i guess i didn't cry that badly

coz i know i'm gonna see them in 6 months time:)

so yeah the past two weeks was just great

how i wish life will always be like the past 2 weeks

but well one day we have to go back to reality right:(

i'm sorry for doing this

i know im being very selfish

but this is the only way out of everything

i really hope you understand

but you'll be fine now

having the two of them by your side:)

My Valentine:)

2011-03-21T22:38:00.000-07:00

If there were no words
No way to speak
I would still hear you

If there were no tears
No way to feel inside
I'd still feel for you

And even if the sun refuse to shine
Even if romance ran out of rhyme
You would still have my heart
Until the end of time
You're all i need
My love, my valentine

All of my life
I have been waiting for
All you give to me
You've opened my eyes
And showed me how to love unselfishly

I've dreamed of this a thousand times before
In my dreams i couldnt love you more
I will give you my heart
Until the end of time
You're all i need
My love, my valentine

And even if the sun refuse to shine
Even if romance ran out of rhyme
You would still have my heart
Until the end of time
Cuz all i need
Is you, my valentine

You're all i need
My love, my valentine

HANOI!:)

2011-03-17T07:34:00.000-07:00

had fun with chia and becky today:)

been such a long time since i last saw them

haha chia is still the same

but i can't say the same for becky

she changed like a lot!

she's just different now

she's not the shy shy type anymore

oh well people do change right

and i kinda like the new her:)

coz i can joke around

and she'll fight back if you get what i mean

work is seriously fun

everyone is asking me if i'm not tired

haha honestly speaking i'm damn tired

that's why i wasn't surprise

when the doctor told me that i'm having fever

but seriously i don't even feel sick

except for my rashes

its just damn itchy

he asked if i wanted mc

but i would seriously rather go for work

life would be different if i don't see the people

who makes me smile everyday

who makes me forget the tiredness

i feel everyday i wake up:)

that's how much i love work basically:)

so today i spent 50 bucks on food

bought awfully chocolate for my parents

when i gave my mom

i was like 'mommy i'm so nice right?:)'

mom:'idk?'

me:' i saw this bag..'

mom:'i knew it'

oh well my mom knows me so well:)

so yeah i saw this bag its nice

and its just 85 bucks

okay 'just' is a wrong word

its quite okay actually

but it'll be better if my mom would chip in

but she's buying my lenses

and she just paid my fees and

bought my laptop

and my party is kinda expensive also

and she's gonna pay for the clothes we are

buying on monday:)

AND WE ARE GOING TO HANOI!!!!;)

i think i'm the only one going with my mommy!:)

i hope i can go:)

loving my life:)

2011-03-01T07:53:00.000-08:00

i love the fact that i'm getting to know

the people i work with:)

in gan eng seng pri and at the restaurant.

working is not an easy thing

as in seriously

even though you're so tired already

you have no choice but to continue

you're co-workers will encourage you

but its up to you whether

you give up or keep going.

i've learn a lot of thing while working

1) its not freaking easy to raise a child up

its like you don't know whether to

scold them or to talk to them nicely

and seriously kids now a days

are just way too much

they say that my generation is bad

well, look again coz the next one

is worse than mine

2)everyone is just rushing

as in they are walking so damn fast

like even when they are going home already

can't we all just slow down

and just enjoy the things around us

there are so many reason for us to slow down

coz i've realized that watching

the actions of people is one thing

you can do when you're damn bored

and you'll be surprised

by the stuff that you'll see

for some reason their actions will make you smile:)

3)when you're new at work

you better open up

coz you won't be able to know

the others well if you don't.

i'm getting use to routine

but i know that school is going to start soon

i'm happy and sad

happy coz i really miss going to school

and what more trina and i are going

to the same course

and the twins jamie and i

will be in the same building:)

but sad coz i'm gonna miss the kids

and people i work with

i'm having a lot of fun with all of them

and they've been really nice to me:)

what more they are training me now to

work in the kitchen

haha really can't wait to cook

coz i'm getting bored serving

and its way crazier in the kitchen:)

I can't imagine, any greater fear
Than waking up, without you here,
And though the sun, would still shine on,
My whole world, would all be gone,
But not for long,

If I had to run, if I had to crawl
If I had to swim a hundred rivers, just to climb a thousand walls,
Always know that I would find a way, to get to where you are,
There's no place that far

It wouldn't matter why we're apart,
Lonely miles or two stubborn hearts
Nothing short of God above
Could turn me away from your love
I need you that much

If I had to run, if I had to crawl
If I had to swim a hundred rivers, just to climb a thousand walls,
Always know that I would find a way, to get to where you are,
There's no place that far

If I had to run, if I had to crawl
If I had to swim a hundred rivers, just to climb a thousand walls,
Always know that I would find a way, to get to where you are,
There's no place that far

~missing you.

Priscilla Chia:)

2011-02-21T19:54:00.000-08:00

its been such a long time since i last blog

since my boss, priscilla chia told me to blog

here I am blogging:)

my life is basically about work

working at the restaurant

and working in gan eng seng primary school;)

its a co-ed school = a big headache

the guys are just crazy

they don't get what they want > fight

still don't get what they want >> cry

yup their life is like that

the girls are such a cutie pie

I love Angie the most

she's so cute and adorable:)

haha and Esther is the big shot there

coz a lot of guys like her

she's small but terrible!

the irritating one > Winnie Phoon

seriously sometimes i feel like ...

but I love making fun of her freaking name

haha Winnie Phoon

I'll be like Winnie do you like Winnie the Pooh?:)

then she'll be like Ms Nevine can you stop it!:(

and for the guys I like Nicholas and Matthias

the most. I think Matthias is such a nice name:)

don't you agree Priscilla Chia?:)

when Nich grows up he'll be damn handsome

like seriously! but i got scolded yesterday coz of him

coz i didn't really scold him when he kicked a girls stomach

so yeah that's about it

oh and another cool thing there is that

I pat them to sleep

i feel like I am a mother myself

they'll fight on who you'll sleep with and stuff:)

at the restaurant

one thing i can say is that working there is

>>>>>> freaking fun and just crazy!!!

they are always joking!

but that mostly happen in the kitchen so yeah

shone said 'bunso its okay if we bully you right?'

i was like 'i also have no choice right with a fake :)'

the food there is really good

and its really cheap!

time flies

its end of February

then March

then by the time I know it

its gonna be April:)

all my relatives will be here!:)

really can't wait to see my 2 adorable cuz

Rachelle and JR:)

that's it for now Priscilla Chia

I need to bathe coz I'll be late

and Jamie will scold me

hope you're having a good time

in Hwa Chong dear:)

with you know the twins:)

2011-02-11T04:10:00.000-08:00

All of us have a sense of emptiness, a vacuum to be filled.

That emptiness cannot be filled by money, power or popularity.

Only Jesus can fill our emptiness & turn it into fruitfulness

thanks for being there:)

2011-02-08T00:00:00.000-08:00

"When there's no one beside you

I'll be there to guide you
Catch you each time you fall
When the stars won't shine anymore
I'll be there.... "

lucky to have you:)

2011-02-04T08:18:00.000-08:00

Do you hear me? I'm talking to you
Across the water across the deep blue ocean
Under the open sky, oh my, baby I'm trying

Boy I hear you in my dreams
I feel your whisper across the sea
I keep you with me in my heart
You make it easier when life gets hard

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Ooh ooh ooh

They don't know how long it takes
Waiting for a love like this
Every time we say goodbye
I wish we had one more kiss
I'll wait for you I promise you, I will

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again

Lucky we're in love in every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday

And so I'm sailing through the sea
To an island where we'll meet
You'll hear the music fill the air
I'll put a flower in your hair

Though the breezes through trees
Move so pretty you're all I see
As the world keeps spinning 'round
You hold me right here, right now

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again

I'm lucky we're in love in every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday

forever you and i

2011-01-31T20:39:00.000-08:00

"you were just a dream that i once knew
i never thought i would be right for you
i just cant compare you with anything in this world
you're all i need to be with forevermore"

happy birthday ya!:)

2011-01-28T06:38:00.000-08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENN ROSS DIALA ACOTANZA!

i hope you had a wonderful one ya:)

you're one of the greatest gifts that God has given me

you're the best kuya ever not because you're the only one

but because of the stuff that you have done for me

for protecting me always with mom and dad,

for giving me all the stuff i want,

for giving me money instead of actually

lending it to me:)

but most importantly for always being there for me

a lot of people told me that i'm very lucky to have

a brother like you:)

but what they don't know is that you're luckier to have

a sister like me hahaha jk:)

thanks for everything ya,

all the joy you have brought into my life,

for being there for me when i really needed

someone to talk to.

i'm really gonna miss you when you go for your ns

i'm the only one who's gonna suffer at home!:(

actually it won't be as fun without you at home

because no one else will get my jokes

and i won't be able to irritate anyone anymore:(

but yeah happy happy birthday kuya!

hope you have many more birthdays to come!

and i really had so much fun talking to you the other day:)

though you kept saying that lola loves you more

which is SO not true!:)

i seriously don't want to be involve in this

but i mean she's my friend

and no one is on her freaking side

i don't get it why can't yall just look

at it from her perspective

maybe only maybe it'll solve the problem

but all of you think that whatever that you're

doing is the right thing

well look again

coz you guys are only complicating the whole matter

imagine if your friend whom you trusted so much

back-stabbed you just like that

oh well we won't really know that feeling

until we are experiencing it, right?

oh well, one thing is i believe in karma:)

mood: happy:)

2011-01-23T21:38:00.000-08:00

okay guys i shall not be sad and stuff today

since ariella lim said that my blog is so emo and stuff

not my fault that i kinda miss him right

oh well, on a happier note

now i have two jobs:)

if that doesn't keep me busy

then i really don't know what to do with myself

i'm working at ymca as a teacher:)

is that cool or what

haha as in i don't even have any qualifications

as a teacher but yeah i'm gonna start teaching

primary school kiddos!

i seriously love kids!

and through this i'm given a chance to do what

i really want to do

one thing coz my mom didn't allow to take

early childhood education

where i can teach in pre-schools or kindergarden

but its okay i'm sure its for the better:)

and the other job is at city square mall:)

at that place i get $6.50 per/hour

and that's the main reason why i love that job

though i have't start yet

its like freaking $6.50!

for someone who doesn't have any experience

like me and for weekends i get double

which means $13 per/hour woah that's a lot

even my brother is surprised

okay that's it for today guys

koh szelin i hope you're feeling better

no matter what happen we are always here for you buddy

so if you need to rant to someone

you can always tell us your problems

whenever we go for training and your games:)

love ya idiot!:)

if...

2011-01-20T08:04:00.000-08:00

ever had that feeling of being alone?

of wanting to run away?

of wanting to scream so loud and just scream off your problems?

of wanting to run so fast that you might leave your soul behind?

so that whatever you're feeling is off your mind

well that is what i'm feeling right now

i feel so frustrated inside

i feel so suffocated

and i don't even know why

or maybe i actually do

but i'm just not accepting it.

oh well, they said that life would be boring

if we do not encounter any problems right

i know where to go

but i know that it's impossible

but you're the only person who'll put my life back on the right path

but i can't be selfish can i?

even if its just a day?

If a picture paints a thousand words,
Then why can't I paint you?
The words will never show the you I've come to know.
If a face could launch a thousand ships,
Then where am I to go?
There's no one home but you,
You're all that's left me too.
And when my love for life is running dry,
You come and pour yourself on me.

If a man could be two places at one time,
I'd be with you.
Tomorrow and today, beside you all the way.
If the world should stop revolving spinning slowly down to die,
I'd spend the end with you.
And when the world was through,
Then one by one the stars would all go out,
Then you and I would simply fly away

"my heart is telling me that i miss you so much

but I know i'm being selfish if I tell you to come back

and I don't want to be the reason for you

not to realize your dreams and to reach your full potential"

hero ~mariah carey

2011-01-17T10:42:00.000-08:00

There's a hero
If you look inside your heart
You don't have to be afraid
Of what you are
There's an answer
If you reach into your soul
And the sorrow that you know
Will melt away

And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you

It's a long road
And you face the world alone
No one reaches out a hand
For you to hold
You can find love
If you search within yourself
And the emptiness you felt
Will disappear

And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you

Oh ho, Lord knows
Dreams are hard to follow
But don't let anyone
Tear them away, hey yea
Hold on
There will be tomorrow
In time, you find the way, hey

Then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you

finding myself back

2011-01-15T22:23:00.000-08:00

you know what sometimes i regret

not crying it all out when i first saw that paper

because i know if i did that

i wouldn't feel this miserable now

i wouldn't be looking down on myself

and thinking of how stupid I am

if i did that on that day

i won't have to wake up every morning

to tell myself that

"well nevine, what's done is done

you just have to move on from here

and the most important thing is that

God has a plan for you."

sometimes i wonder if i'm convincing myself

or am I comforting myself from that pain

that i'm feeling because i regret

not giving in my best.

they say that the wound of starfish will

only heal once they get back home

i ask myself where is actually home?

in the Philippines? here in Singapore? or even in Canada?

because i really want to go that home so that this wound of mine

would heal and for once in my life i want to be left alone

to find myself back

its so easy to fake a smile

its so easy to fool the people around you

and tell them that you're alright

but actually deep inside you are hurting

to the extent that your heart feel like exploding

but whenever I see my friends or even talk to them

they give me every reason not to leave this place

their actions tell me that

"nevine, this is your home and this is where you belong"

sometimes i wonder if my family actually moved to Canada

last year. what would my life be like now?

would i be happy? would i have a lot of friends?

these are the questions that no one can answer

unless i experience it myself

one thing is know is i will be myself again

when i get this regret-ness out of my heart

and the question is when will that time come?

early child education:)

2011-01-10T21:27:00.000-08:00

so yeah yesterday was a bad day for me

i got 14 points which seriously suck like shit

but its okay now i know what to do

wanted to do early child education

because i want to do something that have to

do with kids and i planned like my whole future already

i was like okay do well in this course then go university

here or overseas then get my masters so by this time

i can be a supervisor in a kindergarden or pre-school

then in a few years time i can be a principal

then i'll go home and have my own kindergarden

suddenly my mom called and asked me what i wanted

i said early child education

and she was like NO!

i was like damn okay choose again

so now she wants me to take business and financial services

sounds cool and stuff and i've done my research for it too

so i just hope that this will be the right course for me

so lord please you didn't give me the grade i want

so please help me make the right decision

and you are the one who wants me to go poly

and i hope this is the right path for me

~trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on

your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge him'

and he will make your path straight.

finally in the mood

2011-01-06T20:55:00.000-08:00

i'm finally in the mood to blog

was planning to go to school today for the orientation

but in the end the plan failed again

but it's okay as always i'm not in the mood to go out

i hope when i'm about to go for my jog later it won't rain yet

and when i'm running then it'll rain

so i won't have to lie to my mommy

coz my reason if i get sick is;

it rained while i'm running

you see i don't want to lie anymore

haha it was so easy for me to lie last year

when my friends ask me out and i'm not really in the mood

i'll just tell them that my mommy doesn't allow

coz all my friends know how scary my mommy is

haha i read chia's blog and is so funny how that girl is

so bored at home!

she's like talking about our timetable for monday and friday

oh well, who wouldn't miss st margaret's secondary school!

its where we grew as young ladies

where we face a lot of challenges and the most important

thig is that this is where all of us met our true friends!

no matter what you'll at least find that one friend

who will be there for you no matter what

and all this will happen in secondary school

what more in SMSS right!

so yeah as what everyone is talking about

we are gonna get our result on monday, 10th January:)

i honestly don't know what to feel

i don't feel nervous, anxious or any fear

coz i know with Him nothing is impossible

and i know he'll grant this wish of mine

as he know that this is really important to me

so yeah i've lifted it all up to me

though i still feel that scared-ness in me

sometimes but i mean who wouldn't right.

i'm gonna go to novena church first to just pray

novena church is like quiapo church back home:)

on the 5th of January,

it was my daddy's birthday:)

we ate at marche for dinner

and it was really good

finally ate my waffle with mango fruit and ice cream:)

so yeah the one person i really wanna thank for my daddy

is my late grandma

though i wasn't really close to her the thing that i'll always be

thankful is that she brought up someone like my daddy

my daddy is the best dad for me not because he's my only dad

but because he's living for my brother and i

whatever he does he think of my brother and i first

and he's so funny though my friends think he's kinda fierce

he has a good sense of humour

so yeah HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY!

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!

what's the reason for us to be here on Earth?

2011-01-02T07:28:00.000-08:00

"Some are born to greatness
Some are born to fall
Some are bound to be forgotten
Like they never lived at all
But we're all born to know Him
And stand befor His light
Like the soldier who found his king tonight"

thank you Lord...

2010-12-31T22:23:00.000-08:00

I come before you today
And there's just one thing that I want to say
Thank you lord
Thank you lord
For all you've given to me
For all the blessings that I cannot see
Thank you lord
Thank you lord

**With a grateful heart
With a song of praise
With an outstretch arm
I will bless your name
Thank you lord
I just wanna thank you lord
Thank you lord
I just wanna thank you lord
Thank you lord

For all you've done in my life
You took my darkness and gave me your light
Thank you lord
Thank you lord
You took my sin and my shame
You took my sickness and healed all my pain
Thank you lord
Thank you lord

happy new year...

2010-12-31T22:02:00.000-08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR GUYS!

2010 has been a great year for me though there were

lots of problems to overcome

but nevertheless it was a fruitful year:)

there are a lot of people i wanna thank for making

2010 a great year for me;

my family, all my friends, my teachers

and the list just goes on and on...

i don't know how the year would have gone

without these people

they were the one who brought so much

joy and laughter to my life

2010 was a year of change

change to my life

change of personality

change of environment

and a lot of other changes that happened

some was good but others bad

but through it all i became stronger

and most importantly i was able to gain valuable lessons:)

2011 will start great esp if i do well for my O's

daddy god please may i really do well

i wanna get 9 to 11 points

and go to sajc:)

in time...

2010-12-29T23:07:00.000-08:00

Sa buhay kong ito
Tanging pangarap lang
Ang iyong pag mamahal
Ay ma kamtam
Kahit na sandali
Ikaw ay mamasdan
Ligaya tila ay
Walang hangan
Sana ay di na magising
Kung nangangarap man din
Kung ang buhay na makulay
Ang tatahakin
Minsan ay nadarama
minsan di na iluluha
Di ka na maninilbi
pagkat sa buhay mo
ay may nag mamahal parin

chorus:
Iingatan ka
Aalagaan ka
Sa puso ko ikaw ang pag-asa
Sa 'ting mundo'y
may gagabay sa iyo
Ang alay ko'y itong pagmamahal ko
May nag mamahal aakay sa iyo
Aking inay ikaw ang nagbigay
Ng Buhay ko
Buhay na kay ganda
Pangarap ko na makamtan ko na

Sana'y di na magising
Kung nangangarap man din
Kung ang buhay na makulay
Ang tatahakin
Minsan ay nadarama
minsan di na iluluha
Di ka na maninilbi
pagkat sa buhay mo
ay may nag mamahal parin

this song is for my mom, lola, tita and of course nanay

in some point of my life they were like mothers to me

i don't know what i'll be today without them

i am what i am today because of them

chia's lola passed away today

if lola goes i seriously don't know how i'll cope

when mom and dad weren't there

sya lang ang nasa tabi ko

inaalagan kami ni kuya kahit hindi nya kami tunay na anak

at apo nya lang kami

nag bigay sya na walang hinihinging kapalit

minamahal nya kami parang isang ina at lola

sya naging ina sa akin nung wala ang nanay ko sa tabi ko

lola ily so much!

you'll always have that special place in my heart

and no one will ever take that place away from you

salamat sa lahat, sa pagmamahal mo sa amin ni kuya,

ikaw ang nagbigay nang buhay sa amin nu kuya

lola i hope and pray that lagi ka lang nandito sa amin

wag kamunag umalis, dito ka lang sa amin muna

at kung aalis kaman sana magpaalam ka sa akin

at sana nasa tabi mo ako

pero as of now hindi ko pa talaga kayang pakawalan ka

kahit hindi ako katabi mo araw araw

lagi ka naman nasa puso ko

"I will be here
When you feel like being quiet
When you need to speak your mind
I will listen
And I will be here
When the laughter turns to cryin'
Through the winning, losing and trying
We'll be together
I will be here"

hey chia this one is for you

and its from one of our fav song:)

at least you're coping well

if only i can be there at the wake everyday

but i have to spend new year with my family

and my mommy will be very sad that you won't be

able to come for new year but she'll understand

i'll always be here okay

you can call me anytime even at ungodly hours:)

i really don't mind

and most importantly just pray

lift it all up to him there's always a reason as to why

certain things happen

ily chia be strong yeah

especially for your daddy and your whole family;)

notni im so sorry about today

merry christmas

2010-12-25T09:00:00.000-08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!:)

i guess this is the wildest christmas ever

its like everyone was just drinking

and there were 2 people who were damn drank

i drank tequila coz my brother forced me to

its my first try

and its damn bad

like when in its your mouth only it taste like shit

already and it gets worse when it goes down your throat!

then we drank something else

it tastes sweet yet disgusting

its like a cough syrup

and on the 1st of jan they are gonna go drinking again

it was damn funny when they were drunk

everyone was just wild!

like they were singing and dancing like shit

so yeah before that we played soccer downstairs:)

haha 6-5 and i scored 4 goals out of the 5

coz i kept holding my brother's t-shirt:)

so yeah im very sleepy so tell you guys about

christmas eve another day:)

nights folk!

hope you guys had a wonderful christmas!:)

salamat o hesus

2010-12-23T07:55:00.000-08:00

Salamat sa Iyo
Aking Panginoong Hesus
Ako'y inibig mo
At inangking lubos

Koro:
Ang tanging alay ko
Sa Iyo aking Ama
Ang buong buhay ko
Puso at kaluluwa
Hindi makayanang maipagkaloob
Mamahaling hiyas o gintong sinukob
Ang tanging dalangin
O Diyos ay tanggapin
Ang tanging alay ko
Nawa ay gamitin
Ito lamang Ama wala nang iba pa
Akong hinihiling

Di ko akalain
Na ako ay 'Yong bigyang pansin
Ang taong tulad ko'y
Di dapat mahalin
(koro)

Aking hinihintay
Ang Iyong pagbabalik, Hesus
Ang makapiling Ka'y
Kagalakang lubos
(koro)
Di dapat mahalin

as you can see im really into tagalog christian songs:)

idk i guess i can just relate to it

and there's a lot of meaning to it

when the priest asked us to sing this during homily

a lot of people cried in church

i guess today's sermon is one of the best out of all the 9 days

its about how you just have to lift everything to the Lord:)

all your fears, troubles, problems

everything just let him take control of your life

let him be your shepherd

and i'm sure you'll reach the destination you have to go to

with no regrets not even 0.01%

coz with him we are safe

we do't have to be somebody else coz he loves us for who we are

so yeah you know what guys just trust in him

and you'll see a great change in your life

you'll never feel lonely even if you're alone

coz he's always there beside you

guiding and watching every single step that you take

you'll never feel sad coz you'll find comfort in him:)

as you can see im more holy coz of simbang gabi:)

and i'm liking it

my brother and i finally bought something for my parents

okay he's the one who bought it

and i owe him lots and lots of money

he bought this spa voucher for my mom

and a crocodile polo t-shirt for my daddy

and tmr i'm buying this lotion from body shop for my mommy

coz you see we are gonna trick my parents

we are gonna disappoint them with a lousy present first:)

after training just now i went to novena

to get my brother's present from esprit

then had to rush off to amk

coz i needed to go to the bank with my mommy:)

so yeah my whole family is very busy tmr

my brother and i have to wake very early

coz we need to buy the groceries and get the turkey and ham

which like cost 100 plus i didn't know it cost that much

then get the wrapper for the cookies

then off to watch guilliver's travel if that's how you spell it:)

then we have to help our parents with cooking

and off to ate yvonne's house:)

we have to decorate their place with balloons:)

can't wait for tmr:)

hope everything will go well

i hope all of you out there are experiencing this happiness

and peace im experiencing right now

for those of you who are encountering a problem

just lift it up to him

and he'll take away that burden from you:)

or just keep praying:)

my brother just said we are not gonna watch the movie:(

but its okay there's always next time right

paghahandog...

2010-12-22T06:40:00.000-08:00

Kunin mo, O Diyos at tanggapin Mo
Ang aking kalayaan ang aking kalooban
Ang isip at gunita ko
Lahat ng hawak ko
Lahat ng loob ko
Lahat ay aking alay sa Iyo

Mula sa Iyo ang lahat ng ito
Muli kong handog sa Iyo
Patnubayan Mo't paghariang lahat
Ayon sa kalooban Mo

Mag-utos Ka Panginoon ko
Dagling tatalima ako
Ipagkaloob Mo lang ang pag-ibig Mo
At lahat ay tatalikdan ko
Tatalikdan ko

i love this song

i felt his presence when the choir sang this song

and i was trying so hard to hold my tears back

its like the 2nd time that im tearing during simbang gabi mass

i guess im just very happy the past few days

i just realize how happy a person can be just to be

with the people she loves

spending time with them, laughing with them

and just having them at her side

its different to have that feeling

coz now i finally realize that i don't need anything else

in this world and i don't need to be somebody else

we all just have to be ourselves:)

coz the people around us love who we are

and the priest said something that made me think

coz you see there are different kinds of christians

catholics believe in mary and christians does not

but w/o mary jesus won't be here

we all wouldn't be waiting for christmas

we won't be even celebrating christmas

so i don't get it why christians don't believe in mary

i mean she's our mother right?

training is at 8 tmr

haha let's see if i can make it to school on time

and janelle just smsed me and said not to laugh at

her tmr coz she cut her hair

that girl is seriously a joker!

3 more days to christmas guys!:)

chia i got your christmas card

thanks so much!

though i seriously do not understand

a single thing you were saying inside.

missing you...

2010-12-21T20:32:00.000-08:00

even though we're far apart

you're right beside me in my heart

ily:)

im letting go of you but that doesn't mean im giving you up...

2010-12-21T10:08:00.000-08:00

pero naniniwala ako na our life is like a carousel,

paikot-ikot lang to,

hindi natatapos,

at kahit anong mangyari,

kahit gaano man katagal,

o gaano man kahirap,

i will always come back to you...

and you will always come back to me...

recently my life with you has been a ferris wheel ride,

exciting,

nakakagulat,

hindi mo alam kung kailan aakyat at babaksak,

kung kailan babagal at kailan bibilis,

akala mo okay na biglang hindi pa pala,

hindi mo alam kung sisigaw ka o matatawa,

o iiyak o masusuka,

kasi ibat ibang emosion ang hatid nito,

because of its unpredictable twist and turn.

"kahit hindi na tayo masyadong magkikita...

please keep me in your heart...

as i will always keep you in mine...

and always remember...

i love you so."

~katorse:)

my love is here, my love is real

2010-12-21T08:14:00.000-08:00

Words nothing but words
For me to show
How much my love for you unfolds
Through trouble and fears
This love feels so real
And I need you to know

Even though we're far apart
You're right beside me in my heart

Chorus:
Don't you know my love is here?
Don't you know my love is real?
You should know by now
This much is true
My love is here for you

Time, nothing but time
To make up your mind
I'll give you all that you need
I want you to know
I'll never let go
'Til you come back to me

Even though you're far away
I'm right beside you day by day

Chorus:
Don't you know my love is here?
Don't you know my love is real?
You should know by now
This much is true
My love is here for you

Even though we're far apart
You're right beside me in my heart

Don't you know my love is here?
Don't you know my love is real for you?
You should know by now
This much is true
My love is here for you

since the day you didn't care

2010-12-21T07:22:00.000-08:00

had a wonderful time in sentosa today:)

i woke up late as usual

coz i slept at like 3 plus and i couldn't sleep properly

then i had to wake up at 6

so you see that's not possible for a pig like me

so i told notni to meet at like 8 instead

so i woke up 7 then slept again

and was so shocked to find out that it was like 7.30 already

quickly bathed then pack

then notni's dad fetched me and he sent us to serangoon

so we reached palawan beach at like 9 plus:)

said hi to ms lum and ms chng

been such a long time since i last saw them

and they twins were there too:)

i just miss everyone and i'm glad we kinda spent the

whole day together:)

trained for awhile then we played at the beach:)

after bathing and stuff we went to vivo to eat at pizza hut

MS LUM YL THANKS SO MUCH FOR LUNCH!!!!!

coz it was lunch time so we had to wait

so we decided to do our exchange gift

was kinda funny yet boring

but szelin and i were just laughing the whole time for

i don't know what reason also

then when i came back from the toilet

there was this guy sitting near our bags

we were like wthck is he doing there?!

haha that was very funny!

then ate lunch and trina was being an ass

for not helping us order our garlic bread

so yeah had a long talk with ms lum then she

had to leave and after awhile we left also

it was nice hanging out with them today

just to chill and stuff:)

ta zeny hoped that you like the surprise just now:)

so guys its just like 2 more days of simbang gabi!

adlin i got the card

thanks so much for the card:)

with god nothing is impossible:)

2010-12-20T08:18:00.000-08:00

today will be the 7th day of simbang gabi

that means 2 more days to go:)

i really love going for simbang gabi

its just different:)

you'll really realise that with

GOD NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE!:)

yesterday after mass

someone called me and it was steph:)

my choir conductor

coz you see i've been avoiding them for a long time

its just that i don't feel happy with the choir

but i guess im gonna go back again next year

coz that day i realize how much i miss them:)

you know the feeling after every mass is just wonderful

i really don't know how to describe it

but it makes you happy:)

and that's what i've been feeling for the

past 6 days:)

i don't know why but nowadays

i am so emotional esp when it comes to family stuff

i guess its after what happen at home

but i cry so easily now

and i don't like it

coz for me crying is a sign of weakness

and also not like it'll help do anything right

so yeah i am so pissed with my brother now

that i forgot what i'm supposed to say today

oh yeah tmr we are gonna surprise tita zeny

coz it's her birthday tmr:)

haha and it was so funny when tito allan

was telling us coz my bro and i were like

what to you're planning a surprise tmr?!

haha and he's reaction is always very funny

haha then during mass the person making announcement

is very funny! she pronounced each of us as

eat sopas! haha you won't get it unless you're a filipino

and the other lady pronounced hougang and something

else very funny and i didn't realise i was laughing very loud

coz you see sitting in between my brother and pat and what makes

it worse being near josh, you just won't stop laughing

we joke of every single thing we see!

we were laughing at the communion minister saying

the body of christ and a lot of other stuff

chia have fun in Malaysia

gonna miss talking to you

though you seriously irritate me everything you call

don't forget my gum and books yeah:)

ily and take care chia:)

oh yeah hope you'll have a wonderful christmas there:)

have fun running dear haha.

4 more days to christmas guys!

is that fast or what?!

and today will be the last round of christmas shopping:(

coz we bought everything already

and i don't know how to fit all the gifts underneath the tree

coz there's like a lot of them and the kids gift are all so big

oh well i guess these little things are the joy of christmas right:)

and since christmas is the time of saying thank you

i'll say a personal message to all the people

who made this year such a wonderful year for me!:)

1:41am

need to sleep soon

netball training at 7.30 later

can't wait to see everyone!:)

fun times:)

2010-12-18T10:41:00.000-08:00

i had so much fun just now

that i actually don't know where to start!

okay went to church today

and its father boy again

well you know when a priest wants to deliver

the message to the congregation

he should do it in a way that it inspire people

and most important it doesn't bore the audience

coz one you lose the audience attention then that's it

so yeah just by that you can guess what i was doing

during the homily. okay its kinda my fault for not being

so discipline but i just can't shut my mouth anymore

esp with so many distractions around me:)

daddy god forgive me for today pretty please:)

headed to east coast park after that

at the hawker centre there where they sell

chickens, satay, shrimp, squid, crabs, kangkong,

COCONUT!:), sugarcane and lots more

so that's what i had for dinner

haha we had to plan all the parlor game

for christmas first so max, pat, josh, my bro and i

sat on one table and we started discussing:)

haha we are making the adults buy 5 water guns

and a pinnata:) then the GOOD part begins

IT WAS EATING TIME!!

haha every food that comes in

pat and my bro will be like

here, here and we get all the food:)

haha dinner was just freaking funny

esp when the adults try to get our food!

after that we got our uncle to treat us to ice cream:)

then they started drinking

and we went to the beach to just chillax:)

then we played HEART ATTACK!

haha freaking hilarious

we were making so much noise

we were laughing as if there's no tmr

and finally i saw my watch after how many hours

and i was so shocked coz it was like 1 plus in the morning

and im the type who wears my watch everywhere

coz i hate the feeling of not knowing the time

all in all today was such a great day!

and i seriously can't wait for christmas this year

there's like a lot of gifts underneath the christmas tree

already and we still need to buy a lot more

like mostly for the kids

so yeah mon off to toys r us before church

and tues off to orchard to send my lola money for

christmas coz we can't really buy her anything so

we are just giving her money though she have lots of that

already then after that to ps to buy people their presents

again then heading off to church:)

and by the time we all know it its CHRISTMAS already:)

how i wish all of you out there are as excited as i am for

christmas:)

so yeah enjoy the rest of your holidays troop mates

talking about troop mates

i really miss my troops mates

JAMIE TAN, KOH SZELIN, TRICIA YOUNG, TRINA YOUNG

I MISS YOU GUYS SO MUCH!!!!!!!!

tears of joy!

2010-12-17T08:10:00.000-08:00

hey guys:)

im watching survivor now

and they are like meeting their families again

and yes im crying again

its just that im so so happy that my parents are okay again:)

i just hate it when they fight

my family is not the quiet type

we make fun of each other,

my dad loves to just joke around and do the most

retarded things ever

and my mom will never stop nagging at all of us

and my brother will just keep irritating me

and i'll never shut up coz im always complaining

to my parents about my brother

so you see my family is always noisy!

so yeah it'll be damn awkward if the Acotanza

household is quiet so im crying coz im just so happy!

and im glad i stayed

i've been having so much fun finding the perfect presents

for my love ones though i haven't bought them yet

im really excited for christmas

and simbang gabi has been great

except that i left jamie's book in church just now

and i only realized it when i reach my uncle's place

so yeah so sorry tan

but im getting you another one if my uncle can't get it back

hope chia can buy me all the books i want

coz as of now im kinda broke buying everyone their

christmas presents

and the best way to celebrate christmas

is simply celebrating it with the people you love

as much as i want to do that

as in get all the ones i love to come here

i guess i'll just have to wait for my birthday to come

coz at that time everyone will be coming over

and i seriously can't wait to see my two lovely cousins!

im so excited for april to come

not coz of the big celebration

but for all the Diala people to just meet up:)

N level results today

and O levels will be next

im really scared but i've been praying for it

since forever i guess

as of now the best thing to do is just to make

full use of the rest of the holiday

and just enjoy it:)

so yeah that's it for now folks:)

hope all of you are having a great time with the people you love:)

and christmas is just in another 6 days!:)

Paghahandog

Ang himig Mo ang awit ko
Lahat ng ito'y nagmula sa Iyo
Muling ihahandog sa Iyo
Buong puso kong inaalay sa 'Yo

O Diyos, O Panginoon
Lahat ng biyayang aming inampon
Aming buhay at kakayahan
Ito'y para lamang sa 'Yong kalwalhatian

Ang tanging ninanais ko
Ay matamo lamang ang pag-ibig Mo
Lahat ay iiwanan ko
Wala nang kailangan, sapat na ito

O Diyos, O Panginoon
Lahat ng biyayang aming inampon
Aming buhay at kakayahan
Ito'y para lamang sa 'Yong kalwalhatian

2010-12-16T20:50:00.001-08:00

"Home"

I'm staring out into the night,
Trying to hide the pain.
I'm going to the place where love
And feeling good don't ever cost a thing.
And the pain you feel's a different kind of pain.

Well I'm going home,
Back to the place where I belong,
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I'm not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don't regret this life I chose for me.
But these places and these faces are getting old,
So I'm going home.
Well I'm going home.

The miles are getting longer, it seems,
The closer I get to you.
I've not always been the best man or friend for you.
But your love remains true.
And I don't know why.
You always seem to give me another try.

So I'm going home,
Back to the place where I belong,
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I'm not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don't regret this life I chose for me.
But these places and these faces are getting old,

Be careful what you wish for,
'Cause you just might get it all.
You just might get it all,
And then some you don't want.
Be careful what you wish for,
'Cause you just might get it all.
You just might get it all, yeah.

Oh, well I'm going home,
Back to the place where I belong,
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I'm not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don't regret this life I chose for me.
But these places and these faces are getting old.
I said these places and these faces are getting old,
So I'm going home.
I'm going home.

Perfect Christmas

2010-12-15T06:44:00.000-08:00

My idea of a perfect Christmas
Is to spend it with you
In a party
Or dinner for two
Anywhere would do
Celebrating the yuletide season
Always lights up our lives
Simple pleasures are made special too
When they're shared with you

Looking through some old photographs
Faces of friends we'll always remember
Watching busy shoppers rushing about
In the cool breeze of December
Sparkling lights, all over town
Children's carols in the air
By the Christmas tree
A shower of stardust on your hair

I cant think of a better Christmas
Than my wish coming true
And my wish is you'd let me spend my whole life with you

My idea of a perfect Christmas is to spend it with you

first day of simbang gabi:)

2010-12-15T06:26:00.001-08:00

so yeah its the first day of simbang gabi:)

and im enjoying every second of it!

haha the priest was damn funny

so yeah my parents are still not okay

and my bro and i are planning to do something

my bro and i scared my mom just now!

haha it was hilarious

my mom got so scared and i was rolling on the floor

my mom ran after my bro to his room

and yes we are all sleeping in my bro's room

my mom decided to join us

not coz she wants to but she have to

she doesn't want to sleep with my daddy:(

what's next?

2010-12-14T07:09:00.000-08:00

im so tired today

and for some reason i just want to be alone

i want to get away from the crowd

i just want to be by myself

and to forget who i am for awhile

to have a newborns mind

and to think like them

my mind is all about my parents

how to help them patch up

when they will be okay again

im scared, im really scared

this is the first time im feeling this way

the feeling of choosing which parent to stay with

which days i'll be staying with both of them

and stuff and i seriously hate this feeling!

i don't fully blame my dad

and i can't blame my mom either

im lost, i don't know what to do!

i wanna go far away

not to think of the problem at hand

to just think of being happy

that feeling of never ending happiness

back:(

2010-12-12T21:20:00.000-08:00

even if its just for awhile

i seriously had lots of fun

when i was there i didn't want the day to end

i just want time to stop for awhile

i love having that kind of feeling

the feeling of being so satisfied with your life

and you don't want anything else in this world!

hai but i guess everyone have to face reality some day right

so yeah that day is today sadly:(

but i'll be going back so its okay:)

will be watching narnia with my bro, jamie, notni and devi later

oh yah and maybe tiqah too:)

haha freaking funny

devi and tiqah asked,

we are watching a movie at7.15 am?!

haha dumb or what

seriously which cinema is open at that time

and i wouldn't exchange my sleep for that:)

and i won't be back by that time yet so yeah:)

JAMIE TAN I HOPE YOU SEE THIS

PLEASE COME WITH ME ON WEDS

PLEASE TAN!!!!!!

adventure of a lifetime

2010-12-11T06:54:00.000-08:00

okay let me tell you about my adventure today

oh shit i forgot i private my blog:)

okay for memories sake then:)

went to my friends house:)

been so long since i last saw them

and seriously they haven't changed at all

they look exactly the same when i left for singapore

so yeah ate lots of food and went for a walk

went to this shopping centre nearby

and he treated us to ice cream:)

haha went to this furniture shop

omg okay this is embarrassing

but yeah when i jump at the bed the thing broke

haha the moment we heard the sound we ran out

of that store. i am not fat okay its just that the thing

is not strong enough and im only 50kg:)

so yeah after that we walked around

then we decided to be brave souls and walk outside

the haunted house hahah freaking funny

i was like grabbing both their shirts

and we were at the door there

they were like don't look don't look

so yeah had lots of fun today

missing you

2010-12-10T05:24:00.000-08:00

I SERIOUSLY MISS ALL OF YOU

YES EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU!

hope my parents will be well again

i don't really like seeing my family like this

you know like not happy and stuff

coz usually its crazy at home

my dad being crazy and like saying all kind of stupid joke

my mom nagging at everyone except to herself

my bro irritating me and we having a wrestling match

(not like he stopped doing that)

and me being myself a lazy ass at home:)

so yeah i just cut my hair together with my mommy

actually not cut but make it thinner:)

so yeah kinda left my dad at home coz he didn't talk

since he came back and he was kinda back quite late

so after cutting went to buy bubble tea

GREEN APPLE ICE BLEND EXTRA PEARL!:)

i love that and its only freaking 1.50

that's like damn cheap

then we bought this freaking nice chicken wing

its damn good even my mom says so

too bad my daddy was asleep already but its also

good coz he'll eat all my share which is kinda bad you know

and this is for pris chia

chia im so so so sorry for today

well actually it wouldn't be nice to kinda

introduce my family to you when my parents are not okay

so yeah i really hope you can join us on tues

and don't worry this is confirm already

really sorry chia

so yeah since everything today is cancelled

all the plans will be post-poned to tues:)

and yeah just can't wait to go for x'mas shopping!

will be back on tues or mon:)

till then folks!

you're just the part of me i can't let go

2010-12-09T18:23:00.000-08:00

"Everybody needs a little time away," I heard her say, "from each other."

"Even lover's need a holiday far away from each other."

Hold me now. It's hard for me to say I'm sorry. I just want you to stay.

After all that we've been through, I will make it up to you. I promise to.

And after all that's been said and done,

You're just the part of me I can't let go.

Couldn't stand to be kept away just for the day from your body.

Wouldn't wanna be swept away, far away from the one that I love.

Hold me now. It's hard for me to say I'm sorry. I just want you to know.

Hold me now. I really want to tell you I'm sorry. I could never let you go.

After all that we've been through, I will make it up to you. I promise to.

And after all that's been said and done,

You're just the part of me I can't let go.

After all that we've been through, I will make it up to you. I promise to.

You're gonna be the lucky one.

im sorry for everything

like what i told you im gonna regret what i did

and i guess im kinda regretting it now

and i know you're gonna read this

oh well you're my number 1 stalker right?:)

and i bet you're overjoyed coz you bet

that im the one who's gonna lose in the end

oh well yeah i admit im the loser for now

dear i said for now not forever

so you better not rub it in!

AND GUYS ITS LIKE ONLY

15 MORE DAYS TO CHRISTMAS!

is that fast or what?!

i've done most of my x'mas cards

well actually not really

but for the presents yes:)

gonna have dinner at marche tonight

and chia is coming with us

and we will be doing our x'mas shopping today!

hope everything goes well:)

when i grow up...

2010-12-07T07:26:00.000-08:00

hai okay cried a lot today

and im not embarrass to say it:)

rmb to keep your promise!

or else you're gonna get it

i'll miss you though

idk why but i kept thinking about the future today

not next year or next next year but when

im really old and im just waiting to be together with jesus

when i grow up...

:)i want to live near the beach or the forest,

i just wanna live in a place where its peaceful

and idw a very big house i just wanna live in a hut

my very big house would be in the city and my children will live there

:)i wanna die when im sleeping and i hope that all the people i love

will be there and i wanna die smiling

and i hope that before i die i've done all the stuff that i wanna do

i wanna leave this world w/o any regrets!

:)i'll make sure that i'll celebrate all the important events with my family

okay yeah the most important one is the 1st 2 point the other one is nothing.

okay don't ask me why im suddenly thinking about this kind of stuff

coz i myself have no answer to that question

a lot of us can just say the phrase 'i wanna die now!'

so easily whenever we are encountering a big problem

in our life or whenever we are damn pissed or when we

are just so tired living this life that fate brought about us

but actually there is a lot of people out there

who is so sick but they still wanna live for the people they love

they would spend their time left being with the people dear to them

and here we are always going out or using the computer to just chat

with our friend and actually not spending time with our loved ones

what if they are gone tmr, what if we'll never be able to see them again

there is a lot of what if...

but we still don't do anything about it until the "if" really happens

and you'll be living in regret for the rest of your life

and blame yourself and say " i should have spend more time

with them..."

ya i know what all of you are thinking

its easy for me to say it but actually its hard to take action

i have to admit i myself am guilty of this

but the least that all of us can do is to at least try...

hahah okay i really don't know what's wrong with me

blessings...

2010-12-06T05:26:00.001-08:00

okay i finally saw my gown for my b'day next year

it's nice and kinda ex actually

coz from what my aunt said that the materials

are quite ex and she bought it from uk

so yeah

im quite lucky to have people who really loves me:)

i'll never ever regret being born into this family

a family that never fails to brighten up my day

a family that never fails to give me anything that a desire

and most importantly a family

who respects me for who i am and who loves me so so much!:)

so yeah the contract for the hotel is still in progress

one gown down one more to go

the invites are being printed now

coz it need to be here early next year

the guest list are done

so yeah actually everything is in order

to my whole family, tita beth, lola and everyone else who is

involve in planning this party

thanks so much!

and i still don't know what i want from lola

hahah if i tell her i want a car she'll probably give it to me:)

thanks to you

2010-12-05T03:43:00.000-08:00

thanks to you...

Thank you for teaching me how to love
Showing me what the world means
What I've been dreamin' of
And now I know, there is nothing that I could not do
Thanks to You

For teaching me how to feel
Showing me my emotions
Letting me know what's real
From what is not
What I've got is more that I'd ever hoped for
And a lot of what I hope for is
Thanks to you

No mountain, no valley
No time, no space
No heartache, no heartbreak
No fall from grace
Can't stop me from believing
That my love will pull me through
Thanks to You

(Adlib)

There's no mountain, no valley
No time, no space
No heartache, no heartbreak
No fall from grace
Can't stop me from believing
That my love will see me through
Thanks to You
Thanks to You

For teaching me how to live
Putting things in perspective
Teaching me how to give
And how to take
No mistake
We were put here together
And if I breakdown
Forgive me but it's true
That I'm aching with the love I feel inside
Thanks to You
Thanks to you

ily:)

2010-12-05T01:35:00.000-08:00

thanks for the surprise, again babe:)

haha thought you'll be coming over next week

like what you said

did i ever tell you how much i love you?:) haha

so yes had work yesterday the whole day

it was quite tiring

no it was damn tiring!

it was the last time i was gonna work in scm:(

i had fun working there

like all the people and esp the leaders

i made lots of new friends there

friends i never thought i'll get along with

hope that everyone will still keep in touch and

im gonna work there again next year:)

wanted to work for like the event day itself

but i ended at like 10 plus and i have to report

at 12.30 am and yes that's crazy!

so yeah went home and my aunt and uncles were there

and they were expecting me to treat them ice cream haha

and i got a job at where iris is working!:)

yeah i think it's confirm already

but im only getting my pay on the 10th of jan:(

that's the only sad part about that.

and im suppose to work to buy x'mas presents

for everyone but nvm i shall get money from my bro first:)

coz i don't think my money now is enough and my mom

wouldn't allow me to get money from my account which

kinda suck:(

today after church headed to bishan

bought x'mas presents for some people

and im going to shop some more tmr:)

with, i hope, tiqah yee devi and chia:)

then dinner with you after that:)

and you better keep your promise!

that's the worse decision you ever made babe:)

just saying:)

2010-12-03T08:05:00.000-08:00

and all i can remember about the moment is that when our lips first touched,

I KNEW THE MEMORY WOULD LAST FOREVER.

"how did you know it was love?" she asked me.

"well," i said seriously, "you know its love when all you want to do

is spend time with the other person, and you sort of know that the

other person feels that same way."

a walk to remember:)

2010-12-02T07:01:00.000-08:00

haha okay coz my mom calls my cuz

in canada everyday and their conversation

is seriously dam comical

so yesterday my aunt picked up the phone

my cuz immediately said

if that's ninang(god-ma) tell her im not

available and of course my mom shouted

mom: how's your studies john?

cuz: good ninang

mom: how about your sis?

cuz: oh she's very blurr

mom: what?! that's not nice...

cuz: she's an S

mom: what's an S?

cuz: STUPID

and my mom couldn't stop laughing

lol and my cuz is like what 8 years old

haha i miss them so much!

luckily you're coming over next week:)

that itself makes me feel better already:)

Wise men say, only fools rush in.
But I can't help falling in love with you
Shall I stay? Would it be a sin?
I can't help falling in love with you

As the river flows gently to the sea
Darling so we go, some things were meant to be
Take my hand take my whole heart too
'Cause i can't help falling in love with you

2010-12-01T08:47:00.000-08:00

finally someone rescued my blog

coz everyone is saying that my

blogskin is lame so jamie decided to help me

since im dumb at this kind of thing

yes yes i admit that i suck at this kind of stuff

idk why but i kind of agree with chia

everyone should be happy during the hol

but no chia and i kinda feel lonely

okay maybe lonely is not the right word

to describe what i really am feeling right now

i just miss all my friends, school, teachers,

netball training that i once dread(sometimes),

people i love to irritate, the food in school

(though i hated it last time).

I JUST MISS EVERYTHING!

the saying of you'll only miss something

when its not with you already

that saying is freaking true.

last time i was kinda tired going to school

every single day of my life but now

i want that part of my life back

not going to school seems to have taken this

big part of my life away

its as my life is incomplete

and i don't think im the only feeling this way

i think all the sec 4 out there who doesn't have

anything better to do feels the same way

but at least work starts again tmr

im not working anymore to get the money

but im working to get rid of my bestfriend, boredom!

i want my life back!

my life when i was still in school

when i make people angry and irritated

and when they do the same to me

and when my class annoys and play with our teachers

the time where my life revolves around school stuff

friends, commitment, netball, hw, prefectorial board...

and the list just goes on and on

hai at least some events are coming up soon

how i wish my mom didn't study

coz if she didn't

i'll be like in the UK now and we'll be

celebrating x-mas there and then heading

to canada to celebrate new year

that was the plan

but its all gone now.

but its okay im sure there's a reason

to why this happened right

as in everything happens for a reason!

2010-11-30T02:49:00.000-08:00

went back to school today

as usual we were late

haha the way notni and i flagged a cab

was freaking funny

we cross the road to get a cab then suddenly

there was a cab on the other side but luckily he saw us

bought pizza at crowne plaza

met the twins at island

waited in school for szelin

the witch at the guardhouse is still

very irritating

when i said hi

idk why but there wasn't anymore hatred in my heart

i said hi coz you're my friend

and i wanted to forget everything that happened

haha its so funny how childish i felt when i

reflect back on all the things that happen

im having headache now and my parents are making it worse

the moment you wake up and see two people shouting at you

like seriously i don't even know what i did

and actually im not even at fault

sometimes how i wish that whenever everyone gets hope

they'll be in a good mood so that this kind of shit doesn't

happen coz it'll just ruin everyones mood!